


Rose is a lesbian

by godlessAdversary



Series: Acceptance AU [11]
Category: Homestuck
Genre: F/F, F/M, Past JohnRose, Trans Kanaya Maryam
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-18
Updated: 2016-08-23
Packaged: 2018-08-09 15:38:37
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 2,813
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7807519
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/godlessAdversary/pseuds/godlessAdversary
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In this story we finally see what happened the night John proposed to Rose years ago. Or it isn't?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

_Years ago, but not so many._

_Restaurante Reyes, Maple Valley._

_It was a peaceful night, the stars are shinning and tonight you are going to propose to the woman you are madly in love with. Rose Lalonde is in front of you, and she is wearing a cocktail dress and her trademark black lipstick. God, you really like how she smiles, even if it is one of her cocky smiles that means trouble._

_“This lobster is delicious John. I can’t believe you could afford this.”_

_“Now that I work as a lab assistant I can even afford all gaming consoles of the next generation. However, as a gentleman I must pay a small price for my girl.”_

_“Oh John, you are making me blush.”_

_Great, the cake is here._

_“John, I doubt I can eat this much. I have a figure to keep.”_

_“Rose, at least try the ice cream at the top. It is delicious.”_

_“If you insist.”_

_Rose did as you said, and her spoon made a small click sound with something inside the ice cream._

_“Wait a minute…”_

_Rose retrieves from her desert a ring with a diamond on top, and everyone around notices the scene._

_“Rose Lalonde.” You starts the famous arrow to the knee. “Would you marry me?”_

_Rose is speechless, and everyone around is waiting for her response._

_“No!”_

_What._

_“What?” You say with a shattering sound inside your mind._

_“WHAT?!” says everyone around._

_“I am sorry John, but there is something I need to tell you.” Rose lets the ring she is holding fall to the ground. “I am a lesbian.”_

_“You are a lesbian? But… you are my girlfriend.”_

_You are crying and there are laughs coming from behind._

_“All this time I pretended to like you to hid my homosexuality from the world, and now I am free!”_

_“NOOOO!!!!”_

_“YEEEES!!!! I LIKE LADIES WITH BIG BOOBS AND ASSES THAT I COULD EAT ON A DAILY BASIS! Also, you are kind of a fuckboy.”_

_“I gave you part of my life, you ungrateful bitch!”_

_“I will pay my part of the dinner as an independent woman, thank you.”_

_Rose leaves the place and you are left crying on the floor and eating the piece of cake she didn’t want to eat._

 

“Kanaya, that is not how it happened.” Vriska interrupts your narration.

“I am sorry, but I am only describing what Rose told me about her breakup with John.”

“Did Rose described John as a fuckboy?”

“Maybe I was reading too much into it. I am still sore about John misgendering me the first time we met.”

“Maybe it was the fact that Pesterchum doesn’t specify our gender.” Dave adds to the conversation. “I thought TZ was a dude before knowing her.”

“I mean when we met in real life.”

“Oh, you mean the time John entered the girls’ lockers at that pool? He was kinda freaked out after seeing you without underpants.”

“Has any of my friends not seen my crotch already?”

“No.”

“No.”

“Damn it.”

“Ok, John told me this story in a different way.” Vriska is going to start her own version of the story.

“You mean how he learned that Rose is into girls or how Kanaya has a…”

“Can we stop talking about that, Dave! I prefer to hear Vriska defending her boyfriend than hearing more about the mistake god did with me.”


	2. Vriska's version of the story

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Vriska tells what she thinks happened between John and Rose.

_Tonight is the night you will propose to your beloved girlfriend, and everything is going perfect. However, she has been quite weird during the dinner._

_“John, this giant shrimps look weird.”_

_“Those are lobsters, Rose.”_

_“They have the same orange armor, so whatever.”_

_Rose takes out her cigarette tube and ignites a cigarette. Why is she even smoking so early, and at a restaurant? Oh right, smoking section._

_“Hey Johnny, can you tell that guy to bring us a bottle of wine?”_

_“But you already drank two glasses of Rhode Island tea.”_

_“Do I have to explain it clearly? I am a responsible adult that can afford all the alcohol I want.”_

_You should have considered Rose’s liberal consumption of alcohol. At least she is sober enough for the surprise you have for her._

_“A cake? You are such a sweetie John, but I can’t eat this. It would be a crime against my figure.”_

_“Rose, you don’t need to eat the entire cake, but I heard the ice cream is really good.”_

_“Are you seriously suggesting that I should eat all this carbs?”_

_“Not really, but…”_

_“Whatever, if you insist I will break my diet just for you.” Rose takes a bite. “Are you hap… ouch!”_

_Rose spits the ring you put in the cake, and she looks angry at you._

_“What the fuck, John?!”_

_“Rose, I…”_

_“Not only do you cause me harm, but you also want to propose to me?! I thought you were better than other men, but it seems I was wrong.”_

_“Shut up!”_

_Everyone at the restaurant looks at you two and pauses everyone sound for just a second._

_“Excuse me?”_

_“Rose, this was supposed to be our special night, but now that I think about it, you have been a brat the whole night!”_

_“I don’t have to listen to this bullshit. In fact, I am a lesbian. I have been a goddamn lesbian the whole time.”_

_“Are you really just going to reveal this now after years of dating? Why? Why date me if you don’t really love me?”_

_“Because it was fun to play with you, but now I grew bored. It is time to end this game and move on, Egbert.”_

_Rose walks away, and you are left holding a box with a ring. Later, you walk out of the restaurant and see Rose vomiting in a trashcan. Not a big loss after all._

 

Today.

“Vriska, are you sure you aren’t projecting yourself?” Kanaya asks.

“Maryam is right.” Dave adds. “Most of the descriptions you used for Rose fit your personality.”

“Are you guys doubting the objectivity of my story? John told me every detail of that night, even the parts that make him seem like an asshole. Did Lalonde forgot to tell you about how she hurt her mouth with a ring, Kanaya?”

“I… I don’t know how to counter that argument, and it is true that Rose did had an alcoholic phase.”

“Both stories have been so entertaining, but they have the flaw that they had been told by people who will defend their respective romantic partner to the death. Rose is my sister and John is my bro, so I am a more objective third party that has heard from both of them, and also done some research.”

“Dave, just tell the fucking story already.” You say and wait for his version of the story.


	3. Dave's version of the story

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dave is known for writing shitty webcomics.

_Tonight is the night. You are going to do it, you are going to make it happen._

_“Yo, John. This giant shrimps look sicknasty.”_

_“It’s because they aren’t shrimps, but lobsters like the ones from the Amanda Show.”_

_Here comes the big man, and he is bringing the dessert with a special surprise for the lady._

_“My man, my sweetheart, my soul mate, I can’t eat this brick of chocolate and frosty the snow man’s children.”_

_“My girl, my sun, moon and stars, my Khaleesi, you can just eat the icea cream, babe.”_

_She is doubting at first, but then decides why the fuck not. So then she takes a bite of that sweet ice cream, and bam! Let’s bring Team Sleuth cuz this shit got real._

_“Rose Rose Rose, are you ok?!”_

_Rose is chocking on the ring you bought with your well earned money, and it seems she needs someone to give her new life before it is to late. That is why a big hottie waitress, like those from Hooters but with clothes, does her the Heimlich and crushes Rose’s ribs like if they are made of cardboard. The ring is shot like a proyectile towards your nose, making a fountain of blood as epic as those effects by the great Tarantino. It really hurts and the pain can only be described with noises only known by eldritch abominations and a few fans of the works of Guillermo del Toro._

_“Jegus, my nose!”_

_Rose can’t hear you because she is unconscious. Then, the hot waitress that resembles Pharah from Overwatch tries to give her mouth to mouth breathing, and Rose wakes up only to starts smooching with her._

_“It keeps happening!” You scream while there is lesbian make outs in the floor of Restaurante Cortez._

Today.

“So, what do you two think of my version of the story?”

“…”

“…”

“Kanaya? Spiderbitch?”

“…”

“…”

Vriska falls to the floor unconscious, and Kanaya is paralyzed and spilling spit from her mouth without noticing.

“Did I broke your minds or what? I just told a recompilation of facts with my unique narrative style. I could even get an Oscar as a writer. I have to write this for my future anthology of ironic stories. Sounds good?”

“Fuck…” Vriska is rolling on the floor until she is stopped by a wall.

“Dave…” Kanaya finally snaps out of her trance. “Please, don’t tell a story ever again.”


	4. John and Rose>Apology

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is the end of this small story.

John’s POV:

“John.”

“Huh?”

You and Vriska have been resting naked in your bathtub, and the water is so warm that getting out of this bathtub is something neither of you two want. Vriska’s back is against your chess, and you have been playing with hair for a while.

“I talked with Dave and Kanaya today at Rose’s house.”

“What about?”

“You know, Rose’s big bump, Kanaya’s future SRS, Dave talking about how Karkat is so loud at bed.”

“Yikes, that sounds like him.”

Vriska pauses for a moment.

“Also, we talked about you and Rose.”

You didn’t expect this topic. If your friends’ romantic lives have shown you something is that there is always tension when your lover searches for all the dirt with your previous lover. However, there isn’t any dirt between you and Rose, right?

“Did Rose really smooched a hot waitress?”

Oh, that story.

“Rose was choking on ice cream… and my ring, so it was needed.”

“So, that is what caused you two to split up?”

Shit, you didn’t want to talk about this, and not with your fiancé.

“It was complicated. I didn’t knew that she is a lesbian, and I kind of freaked out when she told me. If I had knew years ago I wouldn’t have dragged us to that embarrassing moment.”

“Hey, you noticed that I play for both teams.”

“That was because you were masturbating with girl on girl movies in my room!”

Vriska turns around and faces you. Her wet hair is dripping over you, and she then presses her breasts against your chest.

“John, I don’t care about what happened between Lalonde and you. A true friend doesn’t hide secrets and wait for them to blow up at any moment. Hell, I was as dumb as you for not noticing when someone is gay. It turns out homosexuality and transgenderism are two different things.”

“What?”

“That would be a story for another time. Now, let’s enjoy the night, my love.”

Vriska and you start making out, and at this rate you and her are not going to get to the bed until midnight.

 

Rose’s POV:

“This baby is killing me, Kanaya.”

Kanaya is next to you in bed and reading one of your printed books about Welcome to Night Vale.

“Have you tried the relaxation exercises the doctor recommended you?”

“Yes, but it doesn’t stop Kanaya junior from kicking my inner organs. I hope you had a better day than I.”

“I told you that I had a good evening with Dave and Vriska.”

“Yeah. I am sorry you had to hear from Dave how I smooched Pharah from Overwatch.”

“I didn’t knew your type were buff women of middle east descent.”

“Oh god, you are going to make fun of me now that I am a vulnerable pregnant woman.”

“I am learning the art of ironic chit chat from your brother. However, I am curious about the situation that led to that scenario.”

“What do you want to know? That I screwed John’s planned evening by behaving like a bitch and shouting ‘I am a lesbian’ to the fourth winds?”

“I thought it was an exaggeration, but did that really happened?”

You sigh and look at your bump.

“Listen, Kanaya. I was a dumb arrogant girl, and I abused of John’s trust in me. Like, I just wanted an ideal boyfriend to show to my mom and my collegues in order to have a sense of a normal life, and John was the perfect candidate. However, I made both of us waste our youths in a relationship that was going nowhere. Now he is going to marry a not so perfect girl, and I am still having a not normal life by being pregnant of another woman.”

Kanaya kisses you on your cheek.

“Who says we have to be normal? Normal is boring, my dear.”

You give her a kiss back, but in the lips.

“You know, we haven’t done it in months.”

“Rose, I don’t feel comfortable that much with doing it… with the baby so close.”

You unbutton her pajamas and squeeze her breasts.

“They aren’t aware that much. Let’s try it now that I am allowed by the doctor.”

“Agh… Okay, but only with one condition.”

Kanaya takes from below the bed a box labeled “Kanaya’s special box”.

“I want you to fuck my ass, Rose. I want to feel like a woman.”

You give Kanaya a mischievously smile that could rival Vriska’s, and start wearing an eldritch strap on that Kanaya mixed with your pregnancy pants. This is going to be a great night for both of you.

 

John’s POV:

10 AM

“Rose?”

“John?”

You decided to talk to Rose and settle this problem between you two now.

“Is something wrong, John?”

“No, there is nothing wrong. I just… I wanted to apologize… for everything.”

“Did Vriska told you?”

“Yes, but I have been keeping this inside me for so long that I need to let it go. I know I can be naïve sometimes…”

“Sometimes?”

“Okay, many times. I asked you to be my girlfriend because I had this idea of you and me…”

“You, you weren’t the only one.”

You don’t know how to react to this.

“I loved you, John. I really felt something for you.”

“… What?”

“You were the only one that listened to me ranting about my selfish issues, and helped me when I needed someone to be there for me. I was so blinded by hatred, that the only light in my life was you. You were my best friend, my first lover… and my first kiss.”

“Then, why…?”

“Because, even if my feelings for you were romantic, I knew there was something different about me that you wouldn’t understand. I thought that if I spent enough time with you I would change and have something resembling a full family unit. You, me, and some children we would name after characters from 90s movies and fantasy books. Then, it hit me that for more that I loved you, I couldn’t feel that attraction that I idolized for years. I am sorry that I could’t love you as much as you.”

For years you always thought it was a joke from the universe. It wasn’t a joke, and if it was a joke, it was so awful that you wanted to cry. She really loved you, and you thought she used you as one of her passive aggressive schemes.

“John, are you still there?”  
“Yes, I am here.”

“John, listen to me. What happened between us wasn’t a mistake. We learned from that to the best of our ability, and now look at us. You are going to marry a woman that can fully love you, and I am having a family with the woman I love.”

You can hear Rose sobbing from the other side of the line. You also feel that you are choking with all this pain inside of you.

“John, forgive me for being a horrible person!”

“No, you forgive me! I have been a jerk for years!”

For a minute full, you two just stood there crying without saying anything coherent.

“I miss going to shitty movies with you!”

“I miss hearing you read cosmic horror!”

 

It took some DETERMINATION, but you two finally spoke to each other in a casual way after years of avoiding each other for the sake of the group. You started inviting Rose to your group of movie goers, and she sent an apology sweater she has kept for years in her closet. Now you two can move on to the next stage of life.

**Author's Note:**

> That is right, every chapter will be about a different version of what happened.


End file.
